?

Log in

Clouds in my coffee..

> recent entries
> calendar
> friends
> -in your face.
> profile
> previous 20 entries

Friday, October 12th, 2012
9:31 am - VP debate
Can I get a "Hell yeah!" Joe Biden rocked it last night. I see a bunch of sour posts today on the Republican side- a sure sign they know they lost the debate.

Biden did an amazing job and man I was excited the entire debate, just ask my husband. It was great. Good job, Joe!

(2 comments | comment on this)

Tuesday, June 5th, 2012
7:50 pm
I don't know why it annoys me so much to talk to my sister on the phone. But it just does. Maybe because I can't get a word in edgewise. Maybe because she'll talk about the same ridiculous and unimportant thing for 20 minutes. Maybe because I'm mean. I don't really know. But, I find myself thinking after the first 5 or so minutes, "Okay. Okay. Just finish so I can get off the phone please."

Maybe I'm just horrible. Maybe it's tension because she owes me money and I know I'm probably never going to get it back like the last 3 times I lent her money. I swear she must think I wipe my ass with money, because I literally have NONE to spare yet she keeps asking me anyway, knowing I'll say yes because it's for "rent."

UGH I am just so annoyed with everything right now.

(comment on this)

Sunday, May 6th, 2012
2:17 pm - Pool Day
Today we planned to go to church and then meet up with my in-laws for a swimming date with the kids. This morning Richard couldn't get out of bed because he was up all night going in and out of the bathroom- so I was on my own. I actually managed to feed, dress, and ready all three kids with enough time for them to play around the house, get loaded into the car, and get to church with enough time to BACK MY CAR IN before my father-in-law, who literally lives around the corner, even got there.

After church we headed straight over to my in-laws and ate a few snacks, got into our suits, put on sunscreen and walked over to the community pool together. We swam until about 1:00PM and Sophia passed out in the stroller before we even made the 5-minute walk back to my in-laws' house. The big kids had another snack and drink and we headed home. Of course, Sophia woke up when I took her out of the car and placed her in her crib at home. So I said good night and walked out, and back asleep she was in less than 60 seconds.

Richard was feeling a bit better so I let him have the pleasure of nap time for the big kids, and here I am on the patio relaxing and checking my facebook.

Speaking of Facebook, did you read about the woman who shook her baby to death because the baby's cries were disrupting her Farmville game? I just about died when I read it. Horrible.

(comment on this)

Saturday, February 25th, 2012
11:03 am - Lack of Daddying.
IT IS SO ANNOYING that my friend's husband refuses to be a good Dad to her four-year-old son. It was opening day for this baseball season. Richie and his friend were both playing t-ball for the first time. Our whole family came out, plus Grandma and Grandad and my aunt and uncle. My friend is the coach. Her husband decided he'd rather take his son to a parade in a different city than come to the opening day game for his four-year-old (of a different father, but he knows her husband as his only Daddy). It's so frustrating and heart-breaking and so my husband is the next best male role-model for him. It's not just the game- he doesn't come to any practices, and when he does show up, he pays no attention. He plays catch with his other, older son, and could give a rats ass about his 4-year-old.

Did I mention he's not very nice to his wife, either? I can't stand that he doesn't have a positive male figure in his life. He's only four-years-old! His mom is going out of town for the day today so I offered for him to stay the night at our house (Richie's spending the night at his Uncle's) so that I know he'll get attention and play time and he's just the sweetest little boy (besides my own, of course!).

Does anyone else ever feel the need to smack some other Dads in the face and say, "WAKE UP!"

(comment on this)

Saturday, February 11th, 2012
3:27 am - Princess Party!
My friend Jessica came over tonight to help me make a cake for Lily and Sophia for their party tomorrow. By help I mean basically do all the work. I was okay to mix the cake batter, but that's about it. Lily's is a 3-tier cake wrapped in pink fondant and Sophia's just got one tier to smash up (also in pink fondant). We're not finished yet, but got all the tiers wrapped and ready to be decorated tomorrow. I definitely could not have done it without her.

I just finished coloring a big Princess Belle to play "pin the crown on the princess" with (since, Lily the princess insisted everything be pink, purple, or yellow and PRINCESS. I still have to finish putting the elastic on the party hats I made.

I made pink play dough for each child to take home as a party favor. Yay! Making play dough is so easy and way less expensive than buying it, but a real pain in the butt to clean the pot used for cooking it. I may have to make more in the morning because Lily will probably want to keep a huge batch all for herself (and maybe to share with Richie).

It's raining cats and dogs right now, but weather.com tells me that by 3:00PM (the party is at 4:00) the changes of rain shrink to 10%. If the weather knows what's good for it, it will not rain tomorrow. I AM EXHAUSTED. Good night.

(1 comment | comment on this)

Tuesday, February 7th, 2012
11:40 am
I'm alive. Not that anyone is reading! Sophia is one year old now! Amazing how quickly a year passes. She's adorable and awesome and the happiest baby alive. Next up: Lily turns 3! I'm attempting a princess castle cake. We'll see how that pans out.

(comment on this)

Saturday, January 7th, 2012
7:02 am - Just got asked to write for a to-be book!
I am extremely excited right now. I received an email asking me to participate in a book! An online acquaintance (I've done guest posts on her blog) emailed me asking me to submit an essay for a) a proposal for publishers and b) to be included in the book if it gets published. Okay, so it doesn't have a publishing deal yet, but I am super excited. I just think it's totally cool to even be asked whether it gets published or not.

The only problem is the proposal deadline is January 31st and I'm wondering where to start and if I can manage it with school starting back up this week. Feeling a little overwhelmed, but Richard assures me I can do it.

Wish me luck!

(comment on this)

Friday, January 6th, 2012
7:47 pm
Richard took the kids for a walk after dinner tonight so I could clean the kitchen (my suggestion, not his). They came home with a cat. A light-colored male orange tabby followed them home. I'm fairly certain he (who I called she for about 15 minutes) lives down the block at this one house where they always massively decorate for like every holiday. The cat was desperately trying to get into our house. I'd let him in for the night if I wasn't fairly certain Luna would go crazy.

So we put out a blanket and a bowl of food and water if he needs a place to stay for the night. If he's here in the morning, I'll be escorting him home.

(comment on this)

Tuesday, December 20th, 2011
8:28 pm - Sad.
Sometimes I just get so upset with my mother. UGH. I love her and I want her to spend one lousy Thanksgiving with us instead of up in Citra (which she said she would do when she finally moved there) and every time I ask her to commit to one, ANY ONE, I'm laying a guilt trip on her. It's just so unfair. It genuinely upsets me because I want her present in my life- I can't afford to travel to see her very often, and it's just like no big deal to her. She never said she'd come down for Thanksgiving (she says she'll come every other holiday, just not this year). I'm not asking she come every year for Thanksgiving, or every holiday. I just want her to commit to being here for a specific holiday. My kids miss her. I miss her. She knows I'm struggling down here.

Her Mom passed away before she was born and so we didn't have Grandma at the holidays. She gets upset when I ask her to come down and tells me to stop guilting her and that she refuses to come for Thanksgiving and when I tell her how tough of a time it is for me and how badly I'm feeling about not being able to have a better Christmas for my kids, she just tells me how rough it was for her when we were kids. I understand that, I do. I appreciate all she did for us, and I know it must have been really tough on her- especially not having her Mom around. I just want her to appreciate THAT fact. How hard it was not having her Mom there on the holidays and how that's all I want- is my mom present on the holidays. Yes, she's still alive, but I miss her presence and I want it here on special days, because it's just not the same without her. So, I asked her, after she told me the things she had to do to make Christmas for us: "And if your Mom had still been alive and able to come and visit you, wouldn't you have wanted her to?" "Of course I would." "Then why is it so difficult to understand that that's all I want?"

I'm just really upset right now.

(comment on this)

Monday, December 12th, 2011
1:32 pm - Straight As!
I TOTALLY GOT STRAIGHT As THIS SEMESTER! Seriously, so excited. I don't know how the hell I pulled that one off. I was severely stressed all semester and must have had a million anxiety attacks, but wow I did it! I can hardly believe I got a 98.98% on the 23-page research paper I wrote (longest paper I've ever written or ever hope to write). I'm totally giving myself the hugest pat on the back right now, because I was so overwhelmed all semester long and am so relieved that it's over. I was totally going to be happy with C+s all around (as that's what I need for the classes to even count toward my degree). But, after lots of nights of tears and days of total exhaustion, I managed to get 3 As! I'm just ecstatic right now. I'm sure Richard is glad that all of my uber-craziness all semester really paid off. Still, definitely not taking 3 classes next semester, only two.

Three was just way too much for me to handle in a healthy way. I was over-stressed and felt depressed a good portion of the semester (I mean, I had thoughts about how I wished I weren't alive so I wouldn't have to write massive papers and fail all of my classes).

(comment on this)

Sunday, December 4th, 2011
9:37 pm - Wow, November was my last entry..
Yep. I've been super busy, and blogging more than LJ-ing lately, since my family can't read my lj and they like to keep up with the kids. I find I get my opinions and comments from people reading my blog then I ever do on here anyway!

Yeah, I kind of feel like no one is interested in anything I say on here, and really the only reason I keep it around is 1)to read Lindsay's posts and 2)when I need to vent and don't want my thoughts public (like my blog).

The kids are doing swimmingly. Sophia continues to try and walk, and seems to not be discouraged at all by her daily failed attempts. She is still the happiest, cheerful baby on the planet. She's got the sweetest disposition ever, seriously. People always comment on how her eyes sparkle when she smiles- and it's true.

Richie is doing amazingly. He's growing, articulate, and hilarious. He's got a great sense of humor. He's a master manipulator. He's stubborn, giving, and caring. I'd venture to say I'm doing a pretty good job.

Lily is fantastic, although still struggling with her "terrible twos." The simplest things can turn into battles. At the same time, she can be super sweet. If this is a preview of her teenage years, I'm in trouble. She's getting better at cleaning up after her self, but regressing at bed time a little bit. We'll get there when she's ready.

I'm OK. The school semester is basically over, but I still have two finals to take. OH YAY. Seriously, I will be so happy when it's over. I'm so backed up with work and ugh, school is just killing me.

(comment on this)

Saturday, November 12th, 2011
7:34 pm - I just cry sometimes
So it's probably really ridiculous that I get incredibly depressed when Richard is gone. He's only gone since yesterday afternoon and will be back tomorrow evening. It may be a combination of stress from my school load, the kids, being behind on work, etc. But it just feels like everything would be okay and fine and dandy if Richard were just here.

My friend Sara, whose wedding we just went to, came over today and helped me manage the kids and clean a little bit. She went to the store and got pedialite for Sophia, gatorade for me, saltines, and apple juice for the kids. Seriously, she saved my life this afternoon because 1) I woke up at 3:30AM to vomit (not pregnant, I have my period [TMI], Richard gave me a nice bug right before he left for his cousin's wedding) and 2) Three kids with a sick Mom is not as much fun as it sounds. She had to leave around 4:30 to pick up Darren from work. Sophia is in the same boat as I am, with the whole throwing up thing- and has been napping on me, on and off, pretty much all day. She went to bed at 6:30PM tonight.

My sisters are coming to pick up Richie and Lily now to take them to their house to spend the night. This is a last minute decision- I originally asked my sister to come over after work to help me out with bed time so I could get to work on my MASSIVE paper due Monday. When she called me after work I just started crying uncontrollably about how lonely I am and how much work I have to do and how I just need some help with bed time tonight. She offered to just take the kids to her house, which I gladly accepted, and immediately felt a little relieved (Lily is going through an "I don't need to sleep EVER!" phase and it's killing me. Oh, she'll sleep fine for Auntie or Daddy or just about anyone else BUT me. Hopefully I can get the bulk of this paper written tonight after the kids leave, at least one part of it would be great (say, at least the History section).

(comment on this)

3:51 am - Sick Sick Sick
So I have this massive paper due in a few days, and Richard is out of town for the weekend. He was sick the past two days vomiting and low and behold, the night he leaves- I wake up at 3:30AM VOMITING. Seriously? I mean, seriously? Of course this would happen to me, the universe is against me when it comes to school and it makes me just want to cry. I have no help with the kids all weekend, since his parents are out of town too and I'm just a wreck. A sick Mommy and three young kids is not a great mixture. Oh, my Aunt and Uncle? Out of town starting tomorrow morning too. Could my life just give me a break? Doubtful. I'm praying I can wake my sister up early and let her be willing to give me a break to vomit and work on my paper.

:(

(comment on this)

Monday, November 7th, 2011
9:03 pm - Beautiful Wedding


Had a blast at my best friend Sara's wedding, in Arcadia (where?), Florida. Sara made the most beautiful bride. The ceremony was short and sweet, with only a mild threat of being eaten by a baby alligator. I did a reading at the ceremony (and was also a bridesmaid).

Here's the reading, which I just fell in love with, and choked up reading:

"May your marriage bring you all the exquisite
excitement marriage should bring,
and may life grant you also patience,
tolerance, and understanding.
May you always need one another -
not so much to fill your emptiness
as to help you to know your fullness.
A mountain needs a valley to be complete;
the valley does not make
the mountain less, but more;
and the valley is more a valley because
it has a mountain towering over it.
May you need one another, but not out of weakness.
May you want one another, but not out of lack.
May you entice one another, but not compel one another.
May you embrace one another, but not out encircle one another.
May you succeed in all important ways with one another,
and not fail in the little graces.
May you look for things to praise, often say, "I love you!"
and take no notice of small faults.
If you have quarrels that push you apart,
may both of you hope to have
good sense enough to take the first step back.
May you enter into the mystery which is
the awareness of one another's
presence - no more physical than spiritual,
warm and near when you are
side by side, and warm and near when
you are in separate rooms
or even distant cities.
May you have happiness,
and may you find it making one another happy.
May you have love, and may you find it loving one another."

The ceremony and reception were both beautiful. I saw so many people I never get to see anymore, and it was great catching up. I have never seen her husband, Darren, smile so much in the 6 years I've known him.

I'm sure by the end of the night I was a little annoying "Momming Up" the party by going around making sure everyone I know has a safe drive home and is capable of driving.

Richard had a minor mishap with a piece of glass and skinned a bit of his finger, luckily one of Darren's Aunts was nurse so I didn't super freak out and demand that Richard be rushed to the Emergency Room.

(comment on this)

Tuesday, October 25th, 2011
9:39 pm
Sophia took her first real step today, without holding on for support, to Daddy. It was awesome! :)

(comment on this)

Monday, October 24th, 2011
7:48 am - 4:00AM Wake-up Call
Poor Richie woke up at 4:00AM this morning screaming, "My ear hurts! My ear hurts!" Sophia just got over an ear infection and now it's almost a positive he has one too. in about 14 minutes the pediatrician's office opens and I can call and make him an appointment. All the kids are sick again. This is the bad thing about preschool: All those germy kids send all their wonderful germies home with your kids. Who then infect any other children or living being in your home, until everyone is miserable all at once.

So, suffice it to say Richie will be missing school today. I was going to take Lily and Sophia to tour the Fire Department, but now we probably won't go. Hopefully Richie will feel better soon.

(comment on this)

Thursday, October 20th, 2011
11:08 am - ZUCCHINI FRIES SAVED MY LIFE
I am seriously the queen of trickery. Richie, yes my son Richie, the boy who eats no vegetables ever, even if I hide it in small pieces in his food, ate zucchini last night! THREE HUGE PIECES! So I made chicken, and black bean corn salad, and rice. I also made zucchini "fries". Basically, I cut zucchini into the shape of french fries, wet them with some beat up egg, and rolled them in bread crumbs. Bake at 375F for 15 minutes. Seriously, these things look nothing like french fries, besides the shape. It should also be noted that both Richie and Lily watched me make these things, and were well aware that it in fact was zucchini, and not potatoes. Richie ate all 3 of his 2 inch long slices without complaint, and in fact, he ate them so quickly I'm not even going to be shy about saying he liked them. I myself was in such disbelief that I ran for my camera as quickly as I could before he devoured them all so I could have so proof that this actually happened. I haven't loaded the pictures yet, but I got there just in time to snag a picture of him taking his last bite.

If you know anything about Richie, you know he's the pickiest eater ever, and getting him to even try a vegetable is an arduous task. This zucchini fry adventure is not some small feat, it's like going to the moon! I'm just stoked and can't wait to try this "breading" tactic with other vegetables.

(2 comments | comment on this)

Friday, October 14th, 2011
7:20 pm
Ugh I have been so busy and been a super-slacky LJ-er. I'll try to get a little better. I spend a little more time blogging these days- because all of my family can read it and see what's going on with the kids, and my non-lj friends, too. Even blogging I spend minimal time, because I just don't have it. I'm swamped with homework and work and I can get neither of those done during business hours because I'm home with the kids all day (which I love!). I'm so ready for the school semester to be over because it super stresses me out.

I invited Richard's brother Dan, and his girlfriend Ashley over tomorrow for lunch, we'll see if that works out. So I haven't told the kids yet because I don't want to get their hopes up if it doesn't pan out. I hate saying that about family, but it's just true. They are super flaky and cancel last minute often, or are just super late (like 2 hours sometimes) and I don't like to make my kids feel disappoint when they aren't here on time or say they can't make it.

EDIT: I just spoke with Danny and after twisting his arm he committed to 2:00PM instead of "around 1 or 2." So hopefully they'll get here on time. I'm still a little skeptical.

Well, Lily and Richard should be home from special Lily Daddy time soon, and I think they're bringing me home a donut. :)

(comment on this)

Monday, September 26th, 2011
9:58 am - preschool friends
It was so cool this morning when I dropped Richie off at preschool. We were running a little bit late- but all the kids said hi to Richie when they saw him come in and after I walked him to "circle time" and gave him a hug good-bye, I hear another student say, "Richard! Richard! Come sit by me! Richard, come sit by me!"

It's so neat seeing how other kids value Richie and I know it's great for his self-esteem. All the kids always tell him when I or Richard come to pick him up, "Richie, your Mommy's (or Daddy) here!" It just makes me really happy because he's shy around adults and even other kids at first, so it's just nice to see that he's got friends that care about him and want to be around him for who he is.

(comment on this)

Monday, September 19th, 2011
1:11 pm - freak-out time
So this is around the time when I start freaking out because I've done a lot of procrastination and have several projects due soon and they all are "pass or you fail the class" kind of projects. Richard agreed that I should stay after class each day this week and just work at the library since I accomplish virtually nothing at home.

I've got to get a new student ID which stinks and costs money. Richie threw out my decal for school so I've got to pay money and get a new one for that too. I'm just BLAH about all of this. Can I be done with school yet? I'm seriously thinking of making an appointment with the college of arts and letters and checking out how many credits it would take to just get an Arts and Humanities degree since I have so many credits already- if I can do that sooner I can just get a master's in education and take the certification tests and still be in the same boat, right? I don't know. I'm just tired of stretching myself thin and making myself crazy.

(comment on this)

> previous 20 entries
> top of page
LiveJournal.com